People keep asking when I’m gonna “settle down,” like there’s some ticking clock hovering over my head. Like if I don’t get married or pop out a kid by 35, I’ve somehow failed at life. But here’s the thing—while everyone’s stressing over matching outfits for engagement shoots and strollers with cup holders, I’m curled up on my couch, wearing an oversized sweater, with my orange tabby purring like a motorboat on my chest.
His name’s Miso, and no, he doesn’t care about wedding bells or biological deadlines. He just wants to be warm and close and fed. Honestly, same.
I used to think I needed the whole package—partner, house, family Christmas cards. But then I got out of a two-year relationship that drained the life out of me, and while I was healing, Miso showed up at the shelter like some fluffy little reminder that love doesn’t always come in human form.
He listens without interrupting. He doesn’t gaslight. He knows when I’m sad, even if I pretend I’m not. And yeah, he hogs the blanket and occasionally bites my phone if I’m not giving him enough attention, but who doesn’t have quirks?
That’s something I’ve learned over the years—everyone has their quirks. Humans, cats, and even that annoying neighbor who insists on mowing his lawn at 7 a.m. on weekends. But Miso’s quirks? They’re kind of endearing. The way he follows me from room to room, as if his little world can’t function properly unless I’m in it. Or how he refuses to accept that he’s too big for my lap now, always curling up on me even though it’s starting to look like a cat-shaped contortionist show.
I’ll be honest, I used to worry about the pressure society places on us—telling us what we should want, what we should have by a certain age. There’s this idea that a woman is incomplete without a partner, a wedding ring, and a few kids running around. As if that’s the only recipe for happiness.
But that wasn’t me. Not anymore.
I’ve always been a little different, and that’s okay. I used to feel the sting of judgment when someone would ask me about my “plans for the future.” Why didn’t I want kids? Why wasn’t I getting married? Why hadn’t I even found someone I was ready to settle down with?
But then, one evening, I was at a friend’s house when they asked the inevitable question: “So, when are you getting married?”
I smiled and shrugged, not wanting to make it a big deal. “I don’t know. I’ve got everything I need right here with Miso,” I said, glancing at my cat lounging comfortably on my lap, his big eyes staring up at me in that way only a cat can.
They laughed, and I could tell they didn’t take me seriously. “Well, cats aren’t the same as a partner, you know,” my friend said, not unkindly, but still with that undertone of “you’ll change your mind.”
I didn’t respond right away. Instead, I watched as my friend’s husband chimed in about their own plans for the future—more kids, more house projects, the whole “dream” they were chasing. I couldn’t help but wonder, though: were they really happy? Or were they just going through the motions of what society said they should do?
I thought about it for a long while after that night. What if they were right? What if I was missing out on something? The fear of regret crept in, just like it always did when I started second-guessing myself. But then I came home, plopped down on my couch, and let Miso climb into my lap.
And just like that, all the doubts faded. He purred contentedly, curled up into a ball, and I realized something important. I was already loved. I was already complete. Miso had filled a space in my heart I didn’t even know was empty.
Maybe there was no one else in my life, but I didn’t need a partner to define my worth. I had my own dreams, my own independence, and the ability to love without any strings attached—especially when it came to Miso. He never demanded anything from me except love and food. No wedding plans. No long list of expectations. Just a relationship built on trust and companionship.
Still, as much as I believed in my path, the pressure didn’t go away. My family, especially my mom, continued to push me. She was convinced I was just avoiding commitment, as if it was something I was scared of, rather than just uninterested in following the traditional path everyone assumed was best.
“You’re still so young, sweetie,” she’d say over dinner. “You can’t expect to have everything you want just by staying in your little bubble. A relationship—marriage—can bring you so much joy, so much fulfillment.”
I smiled politely, but in my head, I was rolling my eyes. Did she not see how happy I was with Miso? Did she not see that being fulfilled didn’t have to mean living life according to other people’s expectations?
One evening, I decided to test the waters. I told her, “You know, I’m starting to think you’re right. Maybe I do need to think about the future a little more seriously. I mean, I am getting older…”
Her face lit up. “That’s the spirit! We’ll start looking at wedding venues, then. Maybe I can help with the guest list—”
I interrupted her quickly. “But… there’s one small thing I need to tell you. I think I’ve already found my partner.”
Her face froze. “What do you mean?”
I laughed lightly. “Well, I think you’ll be okay with it. I mean, he’s already been living with me for years.”
Her confusion was palpable. “Who? You’ve been seeing someone? Why haven’t I heard about this?”
I took a deep breath before revealing my master plan. “His name’s Miso. He’s my cat.”
Her jaw dropped, and I expected the usual flurry of concern and confusion. But instead, she burst out laughing, clutching her stomach. “Oh, sweetie… you got me good with that one!”
As it turned out, my mom was more understanding than I thought. After that conversation, I realized that the pressure wasn’t just coming from her. It was coming from society as a whole, from everyone else who thought I should want the same things. But why? What if the version of happiness they had in mind wasn’t the only version? Why couldn’t it look different for me?
A few months later, I found myself in a new kind of space. I wasn’t just accepting the single life, I was celebrating it. I was thriving. Miso and I were a team, and together we found joy in the little things: rainy days with movies, quiet mornings with coffee, and the kind of companionship that didn’t require anything from either of us except understanding.
But then came the unexpected twist. Just as I was getting comfortable with my life, a friend I hadn’t seen in years reached out. It had been a long time since we’d spoken, and we were in different places, but when we met up for coffee, I felt something shift. He wasn’t pushing marriage or kids on me, but he wasn’t dismissing my lifestyle either.
And surprisingly, it felt good. He was okay with me being me, and I with him. There were no strings attached, no grand expectations. Just two people enjoying each other’s company, not trying to change the other.
A few weeks later, we found ourselves taking long walks, having deep conversations, and laughing more than I’d expected. It wasn’t love at first sight. It wasn’t anything I could’ve predicted, but it felt right in a way I hadn’t anticipated.
As for Miso, well, he was the ultimate judge of character. The moment my friend came over, he walked straight to him, rubbed up against his legs, and lay down next to him without hesitation. I knew then—Miso had given his approval.
And while I wasn’t looking for a fairy tale, I realized that sometimes, life had a way of surprising you. Not every story follows the same path. Sometimes, you don’t need a ring or a baby to find happiness. Sometimes, it finds you when you least expect it, and sometimes, all it takes is a cat’s approval.
Happiness doesn’t come from following someone else’s blueprint for life. It comes from finding what feels right for you. Don’t let society’s expectations dictate your joy.
So, if you’re out there wondering if you’re doing life “wrong” because it doesn’t fit a certain mold—remember this: your happiness doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s. Take your time, follow your heart, and be open to whatever life throws your way.
If you’re with me on that, share this story with someone who needs it today. Don’t forget to like and share!
