I made the choice to keep my job and professional background a secret from my kids because I didn’t want them to feel ashamed or embarrassed of me. I told my youngest daughter that I worked before changing the subject because she was naturally curious about what I did for a living.
I used to take a shower in a public restroom every day before I left for work in order to get clean and avoid raising suspicion with my daughters. All of this was done in an effort to keep them from learning the truth about my work and to free their minds from concerns about me so that they could concentrate on their studies.
Above all, I wanted them to respect themselves and have a good reputation with others instead of receiving criticism for being associated with my line of work, as had happened to me for a large portion of my life.
I deliberately made the decision to keep my job a secret from my kids rather than telling them and possibly bringing shame or disgrace upon them. My youngest daughter was very curious about what I did on a daily basis, but whenever she asked, I would give her general answers like “I work” and quickly change the topic.
I took it upon myself to take a shower in a public bathroom before going home every day so that I wouldn’t raise any suspicion in their minds; this way I knew I would come home clean and without questions.
Their ability to focus on their studies without being concerned about me was my top priority. They were most concerned with preserving their good reputation in the public eye by preventing people from judging them based solely on my place of employment, which has regrettably occurred for the majority of my life.
Because of the career I chose to keep secret from them, children need to be respected by everyone around them and never feel ashamed of who they are associated with.
When I saw others succeed in life more than I had, I was always overcome with guilt and embarrassment, which is why I made the commitment that any money I had would go toward my children’s education. I made the decision that it would be wiser to spend the extra money on books to aid in their intellectual development rather than new clothing. Their utmost respect for me as a father was all I asked for in return.
The day before my daughter’s deadline for submitting her college application, I lost all of my money from my cleaning job. Tears streamed down my face at the thought of not being able to give her what she needed, but no one asked how I was feeling or if there was anything they could do for me. The fact that our family was poor and nothing good or extraordinary could ever happen to us added fuel to all of these negative emotions.
Finding out that, despite all of my efforts and labor, I was unable to give her what she deserved was a crushing blow. Of course, when we got home and she inquired about the application money once more, this made me feel even worse about my lack of success in life and left me gasping for air.
Unexpectedly, my coworkers surrounded me and offered to pay me for the entire day after the shift ended. They insisted they wanted our children to have more opportunities than we did, even when I tried to reject their kind offer, leaving me speechless. At that point, I decided against going home after work to take a shower in a public restroom.
Because of his advanced age, one of my children who has already received her diploma won’t let him go back to work. While two other daughters are paying off their college debt, the eldest daughter is working extremely hard. Regardless, I want to return and help in any way I can, so she drives me there each morning and provides food for the group during the day. It’s a lovely gesture from a family that is already exceptional!
She modestly responded that she was appreciative that they had all skipped a meal to support her in obtaining her college education when they questioned her about her motivations for making this gesture. She glowed with pride as she spoke of her children and understood that, because of their existence, she could never truly consider herself a poor man.
Her greatest accomplishment was having children, and it warmed her heart that they had made such great sacrifices for her. She treasured them above all else because she was fully aware that they were the best investment anyone had ever made.
