There’s no need for that kind of negativity here, or anywhere else for that matter, so when I set out to find out what people think the most unattractive qualities in a partner are, I first made sure to stress that this wasn’t about physical appearances. Additionally, they’re not what we typically picture when someone we were interested in lost their appeal to us.
In order to better understand the characteristics that we may possess that significant others or potential significant others aren’t so fond of, this article details the qualities men and women find most unattractive. It was not intended to lecture anyone. Who knows, perhaps it is these characteristics that prevent you from finding true love or companionship.
I was surprised to learn, after sending a request for responses on the topic, that many, many more women than men were interested in sharing their thoughts. These women genuinely wanted to express the traits they find annoying!
The unattractive traits people responded with could be found in anyone, regardless of gender, I realized after taking stock of all the responses I received, ranging from lack of empathy to narcissism. The personality traits that were the least appealing were as follows.
a lack of empathy.
Narcissists are the worst.
women who constantly create drama around their persona, are egocentric, and are all about themselves and their own problems. It’s as if they call you, run to you, and act like they’re your “best friend” whenever they have a problem. However, when it’s your problem, they treat it as if it’s nothing and advise you to “move on and forget it.”. These women are absolutely intolerable. – Vivi, 28.
Too much commotion.
A gossipy, foul-mouthed woman who speaks poorly of other women is one of the traits I detest the most. My guiding principle is: “If you have nothing good to say about someone, shut your trap!” —Lucie, 48.
Deep Interests.
a lack of interest in intellectual topics. – Peter, 54.
a preference for playing video games.
playing the game unfairly in the slightest way. This is a major turn-off because the majority of good guys will take the “hard next.”. This means that if a girl is not immediately attracted to us, we will move on. – Andy, 31.
Insecurities.
The two most unattractive traits that discourage people from continuing relationships are insecurity and mistrust, in my experience as a doctor and based on what I hear from both men and women. Although many people have experienced events in the past that have contributed to their current feelings, the majority of people are not willing to wait for them to resolve these issues or to begin a relationship based on them. – Nikki, 46.
One-Upping.
I don’t want to talk to a woman or include her in any more conversations if she is subtly (or overtly) competing with me or other women during a conversation. When you are enthusiastically telling others about a new experience, she may mention how she has already been there and done that. This type of competitiveness also manifests itself in name-dropping. These competitive dames typically engage in snatching control of group discussions. — Marilyn, 49.
Pessimism.
Someone who is perpetually pessimistic; also known as a “Debby Downer.”. I acknowledge that occasionally some negativity is justified, but that should definitely be balanced out by some positivity. If not, you essentially put a damper on everything. – Jared, 28.
Narcissism.
a person who is constantly complaining about their schedule.
We’re all busy, for example.
Be mature and move on.
— Stephanie, age 23.
Elitism.
an individual who uses their position in society—their job and wealth—to elevate themselves. Your yearly salary is irrelevant; you are boasting, and I don’t like that. Laura, 32, asked, “How about you paying for my dinner if you make so much money?”.